Post by I.W.A. Owner Analicia on Feb 16, 2020 0:31:40 GMT -6
I.W.A comes on the air with a panning shot of the capacity crowd of another completely sold-out show. The Monday Night Mayhem graphic appears on the screen with dramatic swooshing and slamming sound effects, followed by an X-Men animated series style lightning crawl over the graphics.
Clara Winters - "Ladies and gentlemen, lads and ladies, boys and girls and trannies and hermaphrodites, WELCOME to yet another sold out show of Monday Night MAYHEM!"
Julian Gill - "I don't think it's P.C. to say "trannies", Clara."
Clara Winters - "Piss off, Jules, I work for Analicia Morales! I can say whatever the hell I want, and fuck your feelings!"
Julian Gill - "Okay, but if people on Twitter try to cancel you, I warned ya."
Clara Winters - "Man, FUCK Twitter! Buncha over-sensitive babies and virtue signalling blue checkmarks can kiss my well-formed ass!"
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a tag team match! Introducing first, from parts unknown and Fukuchiyama, Kyoto Prefecture, Japan, at a combined weight of 378 pounds, Okami no Ame and Kyukyoku no Kyojiiiiin!"
Some heavy, driving rock featuring Japanese flutes and zithers blasts out of the PA, and the hard hitting duo from Japan step out onto the entrance stage to HUGE pops. Confetti cannons fire multi-colored paper as multi-colored pyro simultaneously fires from the stage, as both men charge down to the ring, Madman baseball sliding under the bottom rope and Okami doing his usual incredible leap from the floor all the way over the top rope with a tuck and roll. Both men leap to their feet at the same time and strike identical martial poses as more pyro and confetti fire off, again to huge pops from the crowd. The music fades out as both men head to their corners, talking and (in Madman's case) laughing uproariously. They have a quick rock, paper, scissors match which Madman wins, so Okami steps out onto the apron.
Clara Winters - "The Japanese Strong Style specialists with an unorthodox method of choosing the leading legal man there, Jules."
Julian Gill - "Let's face it, Clara, everything about those two are unorthodox."
Bryan Anderson - "Introducing next, from Los Angeles, California, being accompanied by "All Legs" Laura Gordon, "Mr. Iconic" Chase STOOOOONE!"
The lights in the arena go dark, sounds of camera flashes and girls fangirling rip through the PA system and a few seconds later, “LIGHT UP THE SKY” by Thousand Foot Krutch starts playing. As the bass kicks in, the lights come back on and through the curtains comes “Mr Iconic” Chase Stone, accompanied by Laura Gordon, from the backstage. At the top of the ramp, Chase Stone raises his arms up, the crowd booing intensely as Laura smiles and waves and blows kisses at the irate fans, and then suddenly in the background a small amount of fireworks go off. Chase continues to shout heated words to the fans as he and Laura heads towards the ring.
The stage hands push in a small trampoline in front of the ring as Bryan Anderson introduces the final competitor.
Bryan Anderson - "And introducing last, from... I already forgot because it's a stupid World of Warcraft reference, the Island of Shadows or some crap... "The Brew-jah" ESRIIIIILAAAA!"
The mysterious masked woman steps out onto the entrance stage and begins to run down the ramp, but stops to glare at the sound engineers who play the absolutely cheesiest Mexican sounding music possible (as the mask wearing woman had never submitted official entrance music). Frowning, but obviously saying "Fuck it.", Esrila runs down the ramp and leaps onto the trampoline to leap over the top rope, except one of her feet catch the rope and sends her squarely into a faceplant. Chase Stone and Madman laugh loudly as the capacity crowd screams "YOU FUCKED UP! YOU FUCKED UP!" repeatedly. Even Okami, on the apron, is shaking his head, chuckling a bit at the botched entrance. Face burning red with shame, Esrila slowly picks herself off as the super offensive Mexican music ends, straightening her mask a bit. She attempts to have a discussion with Chase as to who will start the match, but Chase ignores her completely, exiting the ring to stand on the apron.
Julian Gill - "Chase Stone not showing any respect to his tag team partner, there, Clara."
Clara Winters - "Can you blame him, Jules? Botching an entrance like that is not only embarrassing for Esrila, but also for Chase Stone, who has to feel like he's been forced to tag up with the world's most inept Luchadore since "The Man of Sex" Player X."
Julian Gill - "Who?!"
Clara *nodding* - "Exactly."
The ref calls for the bell and Madman and Esrila start the match off with Madman walking calmly to center ring and leaning over to point right at his chin, clearly inviting Esrila to hit him. The masked woman looks confused, but the crowd is screaming "DO IT! DO IT!", so she winds up and punches Kyu just as hard as she can. Kyu's head doesn't move a single inch, and he laughs uproariously, pointing at a shocked Esrila, who had put every single ounce of her strength into that single punch right on the point of the Madman's chin.
Clara Winters - "The Ultimate Madman demonstrating what is quickly becoming his trademark in the ring; letting his opponent hit him as hard as possible and just laughing it off. Esrila doesn't really know what to make of it, Jules!"
Kyu lets Esrila have a second shot right on what should be the knockout button, and again, it has no effect and he laughs even harder. Now the fans are laughing at Esrila for being such a weakling, but those laughs turn to multiple "WOO!" calls as Madman slaps the hell out of Esrila, once, twice, three times! Esrila, staggering now, as Madman grabs her and pulls her up into a HANGTIME! (SUPER delayed vertical suplex), holding the masked woman in the air for a full fifteen seconds in a display of sheer, raw power, before slamming her down to the mat with crippling force! Esrila screams, flopping around on the mat and clutching her back. Madman kicks her hard in the face, flattening her out, then hits her with GOT MY MOONBOOTS ON! (standing moonsault followed by a Moonwalk, crotch grab, and a SECOND standing moonsault)! Madman rolls Esrila up into a pin. 1! 2! Kick-out! Madman, stands up, shrugs, still laughing, pulls Esrila up and hits her with a Bridging Dragon Suplex, holding the bridge for a second pin attempt! 1! 2! Thr-NO! Kickout! Still laughing, Kyu drags the masked woman up and whips her into his corner, where Okami grabs her and holds her so Kyu can hit her with Warriors Come Out to Play-ee-aaaay! (multiple corner splashes)! Esrila flops out of the corner, landing face down, rolling slowly onto her back. Grinning maniacally, Kyu climbs the turnbuckle in Esrila's corner. Though Chase could easily interfere, he doesn't even seem to be paying attention to what's going on, studiously ignoring the Madman as he flies all the way across the ring for a picture perfect SAVAGE! (elbow from top rope)! Madman stomps around the ring, yelling in Japanese, hyping the already hype as hell crowd as a very battered Esrila slowly crawls to her corner, reaching out to Chase Stone, who reaches his hand out to the masked woman, only to pull it away at the last second, causing Esrila to smack the mat instead of his hand, which he lifts up and runs through his hair, then strokes his beard as he laughs at Esrila, who is staring at him in shock.
Clara Winters - "Chase Stone CLEARLY demonstrating his disdain for Esrila there, Jules!"
Julian Gill - "Can't say I blame him much, Clara! Esrila hasn't landed a SINGLE offensive move beyond what the Ultimate Madman allowed her to have at the very start of this match! With such a craptacular showing, it's no wonder why Stone is distancing himself from a superstar who will probably definitely get SUPER-fired after tonight's absolute shit-show performance!"
Esrila, determined now, pulls herself up by the turnbuckle, raising her hand to forcibly tag Chase in... Who drops off of the apron, causing the masked woman to swat only air, nearly falling out of the ring as she does so. The crowd boos Chase's actions, but he seemingly gives zero fucks, just points and laughs at Esrila, and even starts a chant of "ESRILA SUCKS BUTT!" *clap clap clapclapclap* "ESRILA SUCKS BUTT!" *clap clap clapclapclap*
Clara Winters - "Man, I don't know what the hell Esrila did to earn the ire of Chase Stone, but I really do not envy her right now!"
Julian Gill - "According to my sources, Esrila said some very disparaging remarks about most of the roster in her one and only promo last week. Chase is showing her EXACTLY what he thinks of her words!"
A blown out, gasping Esrila turns to face Kyukyoku again... Just in time to catch a You Go Sleepy-Time (full-force roundhouse kick to the head), which splits her chin and lips open, sending blood flying into the first three rows and spins her mask around to where her eyes are completely covered. She stumbles a couple of steps forward before face-planting hard into the mat. Madman with the pin, but the ref is distracted by Laura wiggling her tush at him whilst Chase slaps her bum like a salesman slapping the roof of a car. Okami sees this, and he's having none of it. He drops down from the apron and begins chasing Laura (after doing a drive-by sock in the jaw on Chase that stuns the bearded movie star for a moment). Laura shrieks in fear and runs from Okami, all the way up the ramp and to the back. After a moment, Chase clearly says "Aw, hell nah!" and chases after Okami! The ref finally notices the pinning solution, and drops down to count: 1! 2! Thre-NO! Esrila somehow miraculously kicks out. Madman shrugs, then drags the blinded masked woman up, and absolutely BLASTS her with an even harder, fiercer You Go Sleepy-Time, sending more blood flying, spinning her mask back around front-ways, so she can clearly see a focused Kyu as he strikes out with blinding speed and rapid, high-pitched, martial arts cries, hitting her with Omae Wa Mou Shinde Iru (nerve strike KO)! Madman takes a couple steps back, leading Esrila to step forward, but her leading foot doesn't even hit the mat before she faceplants for a third time in the match. The fans are going berserk in spite of the one-sided beatdown as Madman rolls Esrila up for the 1! 2! 3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners by pinfall, Okami no Ame and Kyukyoku no Kyojiiiiiin!"
The fans are losing their minds as the scene goes backstage, where Okami has somehow lost Laura and Chase. He's about to turn back and go back to the ring when he sees two members of the newly signed group Kill Joy Chao. His Underworld vampire blue eyes narrow for a moment, then widen when the third member of the group, Yukari, dressed in a traditional Sakura school outfit, steps between the other two.
Okami no Ame - "GAH! CORONA ZOMBIE!"
Okami turns and runs away faster than he's ever been seen to previously run, as the scene changes back to the announce table.
Julian Gill - "What in the crap was that about, Clara?"
Clara Winters - "Man, I don't have a fuckin' clue, Jules. This place is crazypants bananatown, I just roll with the crazy "momentimum"!"
Julian *glaring at Clara* - "Never gonna let that go, are you?"
Clara *laughing* - "NEVAH, SUCKA!!!!"
The camera switches backstage again and shows a knocked out Remy Benson and Ashley cross, with an obviously pissed off and frustrated Analicia glaring down at them.
Analicia - "Goddamnit!"
Shaking her head before she slams her fist against the door, Analicia walks away from the carnage, the cameras switching back over to the ringside area where announcer Bryan Anderson is standing by.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a TRIPLE THREAT match... "
Suddenly, "Reckless" by Lacuna Coil rips out of the PA and the fans go bonkers as Analicia Morales steps out onto the entrance stage, a microphone in hand.
Analicia - "CUT MY FUCKING MUSIC! NOW!"
The arena goes dead silent as a furious Analicia continues.
Analicia - "Due to someone beating the fuck out of Remy Benson and Ashley Cross, this match is now can...."
Analicia goes to continue but is cut off by a young woman who rushes onto the stage to stop the announcement. Initially, security heads towards the stage but Analicia motions them to hold on, letting the young woman, who she recognizes, plead her case.
Young Woman - "Ms. Morales please, I know this is pretty crazy of me to do right now but you can't just let this match turn into nothing when there are people like me at the academy, hungry, looking for our chance to shine. So please, let me get in the ring with Sheena, give me my shot."
Analicia smirks at the boldness of the young woman, nodding her head before speaking.
Analicia - "Alright kid, listen up. Same goes for all of you! See this right here, is one of my students at the Invicta Academy, her name is Zaelie Marcus. She's been training about a year and while she does show a lot of promise, she's also about as green as the grass in front of my house in the spring time. But because she actually had the balls to not only interrupt me which is about the dumbest fucking thing anyone can do, and ask for her chance to shine, I've decided to give her a chance. I'm going to give you five minutes. IF Zaelie can last more than five minutes in the ring with the Montana Madpony, she will get a spot on the roster! Should you fail however, back to training you go, and trust me when I say I will make you pay for wasting the time of my audience! Now good luck, you'll need it. HIT MY MOTHER FUCKING MUSIC!"
"Reckless" rips out of the PA again. Bryan Anderson quickly adjusts to the change in match.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a "roster qualifier" match. Introducing first, Zaelie MARCUS!"
Generic rock music accompanies the greenhorn who actually gets a decent reception despite no one knowing who she was until just a few minutes ago.
Bryan Anderson - "And her opponent, from Joliet, Montana, "The Montana Madpony" Sheena MONTGOMERYYYY!"
"Drinking My Baby Goodbye" by The Charlie Daniels Band blasts out of the PA as Sheena makes her way out was all smiles especially as the call of the wild from the fandom be it wolf howls, cow moos, or cowbells all but had her floating to the ring. strutting, whirling, and twirling just totally into it as she makes her way down to the ring, stopping nearest the guardrail by the steps. She lets a fan, often a child, give her a quick good luck peck on the cheek, which she returns before shooting up the stairs and hopping over the ropes. She climbs the turnbuckle and once on top of it, she turns her hands and six shooters and fires off towards the crowd. She blows out the guns on her hands. Hopping down she twirled one last time drinking in the howls moos and cow bells with a grin before.
Bryan Anderson - "Zaelie, your five minutes starts... NOW!"
The ref calls for the bell and Marcus and Sheena tie up center ring. Sheena with a fast flurry of holds, reversals, more reversals, another reversal, a show of technical mastery that leaves the audience breathless in anticipation as Sheena goes for a single arm lariat which Zaelie ducks under, hitting Sheena with an out of nowhere neckbreaker! Sheena only half-sells it, clearly surprised the kid got any offense in at all. Meanwhile, nearly two minutes have passed. Sheena kips up and she and the kid tie up again. Zaelie quickly hits a float over DDT! The fans are now behind the rookie as again Sheena only half-sells the move, again clearly shocked as now slightly over three minutes have passed. Zaelie doesn't get distracted as the ref lets her know she has two minutes left to qualify for the main roster as she and Sheena tie up once more. Another dazzling display of holds, reversals, and such happens, when this time it's Sheena's turn to nail the newcomer with a northern lights suplex! The move obviously catches the kid off guard, but she's up quickly enough, charging at Sheena and hitting a running spinning neckbreaker! The crowd is now definitely giving the new kid a boost of confidence as the timer reaches zero and they cheer like mad about her qualifying for the main roster! Zaelie quickly climbs the turnbuckle, only to get caught out by the more experienced Madpony, who Frankensteiner's the kid off of the top! The crowd chants "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT" as Zaelie gets to her feet, her bell clearly rung, as Sheena connects with the Last Call (Diamond Cutter)! Sheena rolls Zaelie up for a quick 1! 2! 3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner by pinfall, Sheena MONTGOMERYYYYY!"
Sheena helps Zaelie up and is obviously congratulating the kid on graduating to the main roster. They share a hug center ring, the kid getting emotional and tearing up a bit as she realizes she's now on the main roster.
Clara Winters - "I tell ya, it's enough to make a grown man cry seeing Zaelie get all emotional about moving up to the big show!"
Julian Gill - "Indeed, Clara! Folks, we'll be right back with more action after this break!"
The program comes back on, fading into a scene backstage where a bloody, busted up Esrila is limping to her dressing room, muttering in Spanish, heaping all sorts of insults the "puto gringo", aka Chase Stone's, head. She steps into her dressing room and the camera changes to the one on her cell phone, as she is obviously about to post a very angry video on Twitter... When suddenly the lights go out, and Esrila suddenly starts screaming bloody murder. Sudden thumps, followed by shouts of "Ay, mi culo! Why you kicking me in mi culo?!?" and "AYUDA ME! POR FAVOR, somebody, ANYbody, AYUDA ME!!!!", followed by an extremely savage thud, followed by a muffled "Mi mandibula! Me rompiste mi mandibula pendejo!", which was followed by even MORE savage thuds, as though someone was slamming Esrila's head repeatedly into the concrete floor... And then the lights kicked back on again. The room is an absolute mess. Broken furniture, makeup kits, busted mirrors, and other detritus litter the place. And, sitting in the center of the room, as if placed there very deliberately, is Esrila's mask, dead center in a pool of blood.
Esrila's dressing room door flies open and an angry Analicia charges in.
Analicia - "Esrila, you are fucking fiiii.... WHAT in the unholy FUCK happened NOW?!?!
The camera switches back to the arena as it goes pitch black, and the tron lights up as the PA plays the sounds of children giggling creepily and once more "Monster (Under My Bed)" by Call Me Karizma plays. Words that gradate from white to red appear on the screen.
"She was the second
There will be another
You will know me
Fear the monster
Fear the dark"
The tron goes blank except for the strange rune-like symbol, also gradated from white to red, and the lights kick back on. A visibly shaken Clara and Julian appear on screen.
Julian Gill - "Did... Did you hear that shit? Did you SEE that shit?! Whoever this monster is, I think they just killed El Chalupa!"
Clara Winters - "Esrila."
Julian *nodding* - "That's what I said: Enchilada!"
Clara *sighing* - "Let's just go on to the next match..."
Drake Connors *Impersonating Bryan Anderson* - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a tag team match! Introducing first, from Las Vegas, Nevada and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, at a combined weight of 368 pounds, "The Fat Ass" Mike Dimter and "The Dumb Bell" Victoria SCOTT!"
Mike and Victoria step out onto the entrance stage, but whip a glare back at the sound guys (and a laughing Drake and Andi), who are playing "Friday" by Rebecca Black just to screw with them. Frowning, Mike and Vicky slouch down to the ring, entering with a petulance seldom seen from them. The music cuts out before everyone in the audience kills themselves from it's awfulness. Mike and Vicky have a quick discussion and it seems Dimter will be starting off for their team.
Bryan Anderson - "And their opponents, from and undisclosed location in Texas and Brooklyn, New York, "The Dark Angel" Drake Connors and "Sweeter Than Candy" Andi Lynx, also known as High Caliber 2: Electric BOOOOGALOOOOOO!"
The opening notes of "Heroes and Legends" by 3 One Oh rips out of the PA to massive pops as Andi Lynx steps out onto the entrance stage, a giant lolly in hand, dressed in blue and black. She twirls the lolly a bit, cocking it on her left shoulder.
**Can't help it that were chosen
Names up on a poster
Everybody knows that when we win it's cause we're s'posed to
Fighting with the dark side
Running but you can't hide
Talking all that shhhh
All that trash it's got you tongue tied
We came here to win it
Won't stop till we're finished
You better be ready to throw down
Calling us famous
Our names in the papers
And we find our way cause we know how
Don't get it twisted we doing our business
They're chanting our names and it's so loud
Better believe it we can't be defeated
No way**
Drake steps out onto the stage with Andi, dressed in a black and blue leather coat, matching trunks and kick pads, sporting a Willy Wonka type top hat of crushed blue velvet with a pink ribbon, and carrying a pimp cane done up to look like a red, white, blue, and pink candy cane, which he spins like a staff for a moment before planting it in front of him to HUGE pops from the fans. Blue and pink pyro fires off with multiple blasts from the entrance stage.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens
Heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
The two begin to walk down the ramp, Andi in a carefree sort of way, almost skipping, twirling her giant lolly around, smiling and obviously having the time of her life. Meanwhile, Drake is strolling casually down the ramp like a gentleman, tipping his top hat here and there to a lucky fan or two, holding the edge of his coat and planting his cane as he walks like he's some kind of old-timey rich guy, occasionally laughing and spinning his cane like a bo staff, which is clearly making Dimter and Scott a bit nervous.
**Can't stop us when we go in
Kings and queens are foldin
There's something in our touch
Feel the rush yeah we're golden
Sending out a message
Leave them in the wreckage
Unbreakable, powerful forces not to mess with
We came here to win it
Won't stop till we're finished
You better be ready to throw down
Calling us famous
Our names in the papers
And we find our way cause we know how
Don't get it twisted we doing our business
They're chanting our names and it's so loud
Better believe it we can't be defeated
No way**
Andi trades high fives with lucky fans as Drake mounts the ring apron, moonwalking back and forth to ensure clean boots before leaning against the ropes and finally looking out at the crowd, who are losing their minds cheering for the enigmatic superstar. With a cocky smirk, Drake casually backflips over the top rope, holding on with one elbow to spin around and lean cockily against the ropes facing the inside of the ring, thumping his cane into the mat. He then parts the top and middle ropes for Andi, who enters quickly and with cheerful enthusiasm, giving the fans a cheerful wave, she raises her lolly up high with pride before putting it on her shoulder.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
Andi and Drake mount the turnbuckles in their corners, a white spotlight hitting both of them from above as they both lean back with their arms open wide, soaking in the rabid pops from the fans as blue and pink pyro erupts from all four ringposts, their backwards leans the only things preventing them from being scorched. Tossing the cane, lolly, top hat, and coat to ring attendants, they both drop down to the mat.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens
Heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
Andi and Drake suit the songs lyrics to action as they lift one fist each to the heavens, again to rabid pops from the fans. After a quick chat, in which Drake tells Andi that "you've got this", Andi will be starting off for HC2:EB against Mike Dimter. Mike again makes a "kissy face" at Andi, who again gags and then indicates Dimter has a small peepee by holding her fingers centimeters apart and shaking her head in the negative. Dimter is fuming as the ref calls for the bell. Dimter charges out of his corner looking to tie up with Andi, but she's not dumb enough to fall for that as she gracefully spins out of Dimter's way. Dimter crashes into Drake's corner, and Drake flicks Dimter on the ear. Dimter turns to glare at Drake for a moment, but should not have and he catches two hard side head kicks to both sides of his nugget from Andi. Dimter takes a wild swing at Andi, but again, Drake flicks Dimter on the ear, distracting him long enough for Andi to nail Dimter with a standing tornado DDT! The fans pop for the peppy little rookie. Dimter sits up in the corner, and Drake crouches down on the apron and flicks Dimter on the ear yet again, distracting the old coot long enough for Andi to hit a running delayed corner basement dropkick! Drake stands up, laughing his butt off as Andi makes the tag, and they deliver simultaneous side head kicks to both sides of Dimter's skull at once, spin and twirl around each other like graceful dancers, and nail him with ANOTHER simultaneous side head kick! The fans are roaring for the display of speed and grace from this new dynamic duo as Andi exits the ring, and Drake hits Dimter with the Devil's Due (inverted spinning crucifix bomb)! Drake drags the groggy Dimter up to his feet and tags Andi back in. Drake drags Dimter to center ring, then runs to the ropes to build up momentum, as Andi nails Dimter with a chop block Drake blasts him with a Divine Retribution (modified Joker driver)!
Clara Winters - "Oh my god, it's the same move they used on Dimter in the triple threat match!"
Julian Gill - "I believe they call that team move "Nightmare on Candy Lane", Clara!"
Clara Winters - "Well, whatever they call it, Jules, it's damn effective! Dimter is out cold!"
Drake exits the ring as Andi goes for the pin! 1! 2! NO! the pin is broken up by Victoria Scott, which causes Drake to enter the ring and blast Scott with a Demoncast (540 Kick), getting the older woman off of Andi's back. Scott rolls back to her corner as Drake exits the ring, the ref herding him out, and Dimter somehow finds the energy to shoot across the ring and make a fast tag to Scott. Scott comes charging into the ring like a house afire, and goes for Victoria's Secret (Gory Bomb) on Andi, but Andi somehow counters and turns it into a strange, flippy, spinny, crazy move that spikes Scott's face right into the mat with powerful authority. Drake is grinning like a fiend as Andi tags him in, and he immediately rushes across the ring and straight up fucking ninja kicks Dimter in the ear, knocking the old man off of the apron to the floor, where he's is knocked unconscious with his ass up in the air. Drake then charges back across the ring, drags Scott back up to her feet and then hits a Reverse Alabama Slam airplane spin as Andi flies in with an off the top rope Codebreaker!
Julian Gill - "By gawd, I think they just killed Victoria Scott!"
Clara *shuffling papers* - "They call THAT one the Cotton Candy Fever Dream, Jules, and I don't think I've EVER seen a more athletic and original team finisher!"
Drake, as the legal man, rolls Scott up and gets the 1!2!3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners by pinfall, "The Dark Angel" Drake Connors and "Sweeter Than Candy" Andi Lynx, HIGH CALIBER 2: ELECTRIC BOOOOOOGALOOOOOOO!!!!"
"Heroes and Legends" rips out of the PA as Andi and Drake point finger guns at Dimter and Scott, dropping the "hammers" at the same time as the crowd yells along with them for a "BANG! YOU'RE DEAD!!" Reclaiming their props from the attendants, Drake slips on his coat and pops on his fresh top hat, holding the ropes open for the giant lolly wielding Andi Lynx, who exits the ring, followed by Drake with his usual cocky backflip over the rope exit, then both members of the newly formed tag team strut confidently back up the ramp to the back as a groggy Victoria Scott pulls an even more groggy Mike Dimter up to his feet to limp on over to the backstage area.
Cameras cut back over to Bryan Anderson who is ready to get things rolling with the show's main event as the hot crowd is cheering in anticipation.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen this next match is your Monday Night Mayhem MAIN EVENT!! Introducing first, now residing in Florida, coming to us by way of London, England, he is "THE SYSTEM" DANIIEEL SLAAIINNE!"
"99 Bottles" blasts from the arenas pa system and a smiling Daniel Slaine walks out from behind the curtain,he stands smiling out at the crowd and starts to bounce up and down on his toes before running the length of the ramp and sliding into the ring under the bottom rope, Slaine quickly climbs the ropes and throws his fists in the air roaring out at the fans who in turn roar back.
Bryan Anderson - "Now introducing his opponent, from Winnipeg, Canada, Austin REYNOOOOLDS!"
The fans go bananas as "Devil Trigger" by Case Edwards blasts out of the PA and Austin Reynolds steps out from behind the curtain. He poses for a moment before firing a finger gun at the camera and then charging down to the ring to baseball slide in under the bottom rope. While it looks as though he's getting ready to pose after getting up to his feet, instead he blindsides Slaine who was waiting just outside the ring with a baseball dropkick. Now joining him outside of the ring, Reynolds lays in some stiff strikes, also bouncing Daniel's head against the ring apron a few times before tossing him back into the ring.
Julian Gill - "Austin Reynolds not playing games tonight here Clara."
Clara Winters - "Yeah I'm definitely shocked he went after Slaine the way he did but with Gold Rush just around the corner you can't blame the guy."
Austin slides back into the ring, nailing Slaine with a few knees to the midsection but as he goes to pick him up Daniel spins out of it and drops him with a discus clothesline that nearly takes his head off. Obviously irritated from the tactics used earlier, Slaine wastes no time in following up after the heavy strike, picking up Austin and dropping him right back to the canvas with the KTFO (Knocked the fuck out-GTS) pinning him for the three count!
Bryan Anderson - "Here is your winner of the match, DAANIIEEL SLAAAIINNE!"
Slaine's celebration is cut short as the familiar sound of "Reckless" by Lacuna Coil starts to be heard. Invicta owner Analicia comes out, seeming not pissed off for the first time all night. Raising the mic up, she gives a quick cut throat signal which leads to her music immediately stopping as she begins her address.
Analicia - "Pretty fucking impressive, I must say. Now I'm going to make this as short as possible since I know if I don't, someone else on my roster's going to end up with their ass kicked or dead so here goes. This match was of great importance regarding our first pay-per-view Gold Rush. Now while the outcome doesn't exactly mean that one of you is out of the match, it most certainly means that the other is in. So congratulations, soak in the moment while you can."
Analicia, as she stated, made it short and sweet, quickly heading backstage as Daniel Slaine looks on pleased, the slow closing out with him celebrating some more as the crowd goes wild.
Clara Winters - "Ladies and gentlemen, lads and ladies, boys and girls and trannies and hermaphrodites, WELCOME to yet another sold out show of Monday Night MAYHEM!"
Julian Gill - "I don't think it's P.C. to say "trannies", Clara."
Clara Winters - "Piss off, Jules, I work for Analicia Morales! I can say whatever the hell I want, and fuck your feelings!"
Julian Gill - "Okay, but if people on Twitter try to cancel you, I warned ya."
Clara Winters - "Man, FUCK Twitter! Buncha over-sensitive babies and virtue signalling blue checkmarks can kiss my well-formed ass!"
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is a tag team match! Introducing first, from parts unknown and Fukuchiyama, Kyoto Prefecture, Japan, at a combined weight of 378 pounds, Okami no Ame and Kyukyoku no Kyojiiiiin!"
Some heavy, driving rock featuring Japanese flutes and zithers blasts out of the PA, and the hard hitting duo from Japan step out onto the entrance stage to HUGE pops. Confetti cannons fire multi-colored paper as multi-colored pyro simultaneously fires from the stage, as both men charge down to the ring, Madman baseball sliding under the bottom rope and Okami doing his usual incredible leap from the floor all the way over the top rope with a tuck and roll. Both men leap to their feet at the same time and strike identical martial poses as more pyro and confetti fire off, again to huge pops from the crowd. The music fades out as both men head to their corners, talking and (in Madman's case) laughing uproariously. They have a quick rock, paper, scissors match which Madman wins, so Okami steps out onto the apron.
Clara Winters - "The Japanese Strong Style specialists with an unorthodox method of choosing the leading legal man there, Jules."
Julian Gill - "Let's face it, Clara, everything about those two are unorthodox."
Bryan Anderson - "Introducing next, from Los Angeles, California, being accompanied by "All Legs" Laura Gordon, "Mr. Iconic" Chase STOOOOONE!"
The lights in the arena go dark, sounds of camera flashes and girls fangirling rip through the PA system and a few seconds later, “LIGHT UP THE SKY” by Thousand Foot Krutch starts playing. As the bass kicks in, the lights come back on and through the curtains comes “Mr Iconic” Chase Stone, accompanied by Laura Gordon, from the backstage. At the top of the ramp, Chase Stone raises his arms up, the crowd booing intensely as Laura smiles and waves and blows kisses at the irate fans, and then suddenly in the background a small amount of fireworks go off. Chase continues to shout heated words to the fans as he and Laura heads towards the ring.
The stage hands push in a small trampoline in front of the ring as Bryan Anderson introduces the final competitor.
Bryan Anderson - "And introducing last, from... I already forgot because it's a stupid World of Warcraft reference, the Island of Shadows or some crap... "The Brew-jah" ESRIIIIILAAAA!"
The mysterious masked woman steps out onto the entrance stage and begins to run down the ramp, but stops to glare at the sound engineers who play the absolutely cheesiest Mexican sounding music possible (as the mask wearing woman had never submitted official entrance music). Frowning, but obviously saying "Fuck it.", Esrila runs down the ramp and leaps onto the trampoline to leap over the top rope, except one of her feet catch the rope and sends her squarely into a faceplant. Chase Stone and Madman laugh loudly as the capacity crowd screams "YOU FUCKED UP! YOU FUCKED UP!" repeatedly. Even Okami, on the apron, is shaking his head, chuckling a bit at the botched entrance. Face burning red with shame, Esrila slowly picks herself off as the super offensive Mexican music ends, straightening her mask a bit. She attempts to have a discussion with Chase as to who will start the match, but Chase ignores her completely, exiting the ring to stand on the apron.
Julian Gill - "Chase Stone not showing any respect to his tag team partner, there, Clara."
Clara Winters - "Can you blame him, Jules? Botching an entrance like that is not only embarrassing for Esrila, but also for Chase Stone, who has to feel like he's been forced to tag up with the world's most inept Luchadore since "The Man of Sex" Player X."
Julian Gill - "Who?!"
Clara *nodding* - "Exactly."
The ref calls for the bell and Madman and Esrila start the match off with Madman walking calmly to center ring and leaning over to point right at his chin, clearly inviting Esrila to hit him. The masked woman looks confused, but the crowd is screaming "DO IT! DO IT!", so she winds up and punches Kyu just as hard as she can. Kyu's head doesn't move a single inch, and he laughs uproariously, pointing at a shocked Esrila, who had put every single ounce of her strength into that single punch right on the point of the Madman's chin.
Clara Winters - "The Ultimate Madman demonstrating what is quickly becoming his trademark in the ring; letting his opponent hit him as hard as possible and just laughing it off. Esrila doesn't really know what to make of it, Jules!"
Kyu lets Esrila have a second shot right on what should be the knockout button, and again, it has no effect and he laughs even harder. Now the fans are laughing at Esrila for being such a weakling, but those laughs turn to multiple "WOO!" calls as Madman slaps the hell out of Esrila, once, twice, three times! Esrila, staggering now, as Madman grabs her and pulls her up into a HANGTIME! (SUPER delayed vertical suplex), holding the masked woman in the air for a full fifteen seconds in a display of sheer, raw power, before slamming her down to the mat with crippling force! Esrila screams, flopping around on the mat and clutching her back. Madman kicks her hard in the face, flattening her out, then hits her with GOT MY MOONBOOTS ON! (standing moonsault followed by a Moonwalk, crotch grab, and a SECOND standing moonsault)! Madman rolls Esrila up into a pin. 1! 2! Kick-out! Madman, stands up, shrugs, still laughing, pulls Esrila up and hits her with a Bridging Dragon Suplex, holding the bridge for a second pin attempt! 1! 2! Thr-NO! Kickout! Still laughing, Kyu drags the masked woman up and whips her into his corner, where Okami grabs her and holds her so Kyu can hit her with Warriors Come Out to Play-ee-aaaay! (multiple corner splashes)! Esrila flops out of the corner, landing face down, rolling slowly onto her back. Grinning maniacally, Kyu climbs the turnbuckle in Esrila's corner. Though Chase could easily interfere, he doesn't even seem to be paying attention to what's going on, studiously ignoring the Madman as he flies all the way across the ring for a picture perfect SAVAGE! (elbow from top rope)! Madman stomps around the ring, yelling in Japanese, hyping the already hype as hell crowd as a very battered Esrila slowly crawls to her corner, reaching out to Chase Stone, who reaches his hand out to the masked woman, only to pull it away at the last second, causing Esrila to smack the mat instead of his hand, which he lifts up and runs through his hair, then strokes his beard as he laughs at Esrila, who is staring at him in shock.
Clara Winters - "Chase Stone CLEARLY demonstrating his disdain for Esrila there, Jules!"
Julian Gill - "Can't say I blame him much, Clara! Esrila hasn't landed a SINGLE offensive move beyond what the Ultimate Madman allowed her to have at the very start of this match! With such a craptacular showing, it's no wonder why Stone is distancing himself from a superstar who will probably definitely get SUPER-fired after tonight's absolute shit-show performance!"
Esrila, determined now, pulls herself up by the turnbuckle, raising her hand to forcibly tag Chase in... Who drops off of the apron, causing the masked woman to swat only air, nearly falling out of the ring as she does so. The crowd boos Chase's actions, but he seemingly gives zero fucks, just points and laughs at Esrila, and even starts a chant of "ESRILA SUCKS BUTT!" *clap clap clapclapclap* "ESRILA SUCKS BUTT!" *clap clap clapclapclap*
Clara Winters - "Man, I don't know what the hell Esrila did to earn the ire of Chase Stone, but I really do not envy her right now!"
Julian Gill - "According to my sources, Esrila said some very disparaging remarks about most of the roster in her one and only promo last week. Chase is showing her EXACTLY what he thinks of her words!"
A blown out, gasping Esrila turns to face Kyukyoku again... Just in time to catch a You Go Sleepy-Time (full-force roundhouse kick to the head), which splits her chin and lips open, sending blood flying into the first three rows and spins her mask around to where her eyes are completely covered. She stumbles a couple of steps forward before face-planting hard into the mat. Madman with the pin, but the ref is distracted by Laura wiggling her tush at him whilst Chase slaps her bum like a salesman slapping the roof of a car. Okami sees this, and he's having none of it. He drops down from the apron and begins chasing Laura (after doing a drive-by sock in the jaw on Chase that stuns the bearded movie star for a moment). Laura shrieks in fear and runs from Okami, all the way up the ramp and to the back. After a moment, Chase clearly says "Aw, hell nah!" and chases after Okami! The ref finally notices the pinning solution, and drops down to count: 1! 2! Thre-NO! Esrila somehow miraculously kicks out. Madman shrugs, then drags the blinded masked woman up, and absolutely BLASTS her with an even harder, fiercer You Go Sleepy-Time, sending more blood flying, spinning her mask back around front-ways, so she can clearly see a focused Kyu as he strikes out with blinding speed and rapid, high-pitched, martial arts cries, hitting her with Omae Wa Mou Shinde Iru (nerve strike KO)! Madman takes a couple steps back, leading Esrila to step forward, but her leading foot doesn't even hit the mat before she faceplants for a third time in the match. The fans are going berserk in spite of the one-sided beatdown as Madman rolls Esrila up for the 1! 2! 3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners by pinfall, Okami no Ame and Kyukyoku no Kyojiiiiiin!"
The fans are losing their minds as the scene goes backstage, where Okami has somehow lost Laura and Chase. He's about to turn back and go back to the ring when he sees two members of the newly signed group Kill Joy Chao. His Underworld vampire blue eyes narrow for a moment, then widen when the third member of the group, Yukari, dressed in a traditional Sakura school outfit, steps between the other two.
Okami no Ame - "GAH! CORONA ZOMBIE!"
Okami turns and runs away faster than he's ever been seen to previously run, as the scene changes back to the announce table.
Julian Gill - "What in the crap was that about, Clara?"
Clara Winters - "Man, I don't have a fuckin' clue, Jules. This place is crazypants bananatown, I just roll with the crazy "momentimum"!"
Julian *glaring at Clara* - "Never gonna let that go, are you?"
Clara *laughing* - "NEVAH, SUCKA!!!!"
The camera switches backstage again and shows a knocked out Remy Benson and Ashley cross, with an obviously pissed off and frustrated Analicia glaring down at them.
Analicia - "Goddamnit!"
Shaking her head before she slams her fist against the door, Analicia walks away from the carnage, the cameras switching back over to the ringside area where announcer Bryan Anderson is standing by.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a TRIPLE THREAT match... "
Suddenly, "Reckless" by Lacuna Coil rips out of the PA and the fans go bonkers as Analicia Morales steps out onto the entrance stage, a microphone in hand.
Analicia - "CUT MY FUCKING MUSIC! NOW!"
The arena goes dead silent as a furious Analicia continues.
Analicia - "Due to someone beating the fuck out of Remy Benson and Ashley Cross, this match is now can...."
Analicia goes to continue but is cut off by a young woman who rushes onto the stage to stop the announcement. Initially, security heads towards the stage but Analicia motions them to hold on, letting the young woman, who she recognizes, plead her case.
Young Woman - "Ms. Morales please, I know this is pretty crazy of me to do right now but you can't just let this match turn into nothing when there are people like me at the academy, hungry, looking for our chance to shine. So please, let me get in the ring with Sheena, give me my shot."
Analicia smirks at the boldness of the young woman, nodding her head before speaking.
Analicia - "Alright kid, listen up. Same goes for all of you! See this right here, is one of my students at the Invicta Academy, her name is Zaelie Marcus. She's been training about a year and while she does show a lot of promise, she's also about as green as the grass in front of my house in the spring time. But because she actually had the balls to not only interrupt me which is about the dumbest fucking thing anyone can do, and ask for her chance to shine, I've decided to give her a chance. I'm going to give you five minutes. IF Zaelie can last more than five minutes in the ring with the Montana Madpony, she will get a spot on the roster! Should you fail however, back to training you go, and trust me when I say I will make you pay for wasting the time of my audience! Now good luck, you'll need it. HIT MY MOTHER FUCKING MUSIC!"
"Reckless" rips out of the PA again. Bryan Anderson quickly adjusts to the change in match.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a "roster qualifier" match. Introducing first, Zaelie MARCUS!"
Generic rock music accompanies the greenhorn who actually gets a decent reception despite no one knowing who she was until just a few minutes ago.
Bryan Anderson - "And her opponent, from Joliet, Montana, "The Montana Madpony" Sheena MONTGOMERYYYY!"
"Drinking My Baby Goodbye" by The Charlie Daniels Band blasts out of the PA as Sheena makes her way out was all smiles especially as the call of the wild from the fandom be it wolf howls, cow moos, or cowbells all but had her floating to the ring. strutting, whirling, and twirling just totally into it as she makes her way down to the ring, stopping nearest the guardrail by the steps. She lets a fan, often a child, give her a quick good luck peck on the cheek, which she returns before shooting up the stairs and hopping over the ropes. She climbs the turnbuckle and once on top of it, she turns her hands and six shooters and fires off towards the crowd. She blows out the guns on her hands. Hopping down she twirled one last time drinking in the howls moos and cow bells with a grin before.
Bryan Anderson - "Zaelie, your five minutes starts... NOW!"
The ref calls for the bell and Marcus and Sheena tie up center ring. Sheena with a fast flurry of holds, reversals, more reversals, another reversal, a show of technical mastery that leaves the audience breathless in anticipation as Sheena goes for a single arm lariat which Zaelie ducks under, hitting Sheena with an out of nowhere neckbreaker! Sheena only half-sells it, clearly surprised the kid got any offense in at all. Meanwhile, nearly two minutes have passed. Sheena kips up and she and the kid tie up again. Zaelie quickly hits a float over DDT! The fans are now behind the rookie as again Sheena only half-sells the move, again clearly shocked as now slightly over three minutes have passed. Zaelie doesn't get distracted as the ref lets her know she has two minutes left to qualify for the main roster as she and Sheena tie up once more. Another dazzling display of holds, reversals, and such happens, when this time it's Sheena's turn to nail the newcomer with a northern lights suplex! The move obviously catches the kid off guard, but she's up quickly enough, charging at Sheena and hitting a running spinning neckbreaker! The crowd is now definitely giving the new kid a boost of confidence as the timer reaches zero and they cheer like mad about her qualifying for the main roster! Zaelie quickly climbs the turnbuckle, only to get caught out by the more experienced Madpony, who Frankensteiner's the kid off of the top! The crowd chants "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT" as Zaelie gets to her feet, her bell clearly rung, as Sheena connects with the Last Call (Diamond Cutter)! Sheena rolls Zaelie up for a quick 1! 2! 3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner by pinfall, Sheena MONTGOMERYYYYY!"
Sheena helps Zaelie up and is obviously congratulating the kid on graduating to the main roster. They share a hug center ring, the kid getting emotional and tearing up a bit as she realizes she's now on the main roster.
Clara Winters - "I tell ya, it's enough to make a grown man cry seeing Zaelie get all emotional about moving up to the big show!"
Julian Gill - "Indeed, Clara! Folks, we'll be right back with more action after this break!"
The program comes back on, fading into a scene backstage where a bloody, busted up Esrila is limping to her dressing room, muttering in Spanish, heaping all sorts of insults the "puto gringo", aka Chase Stone's, head. She steps into her dressing room and the camera changes to the one on her cell phone, as she is obviously about to post a very angry video on Twitter... When suddenly the lights go out, and Esrila suddenly starts screaming bloody murder. Sudden thumps, followed by shouts of "Ay, mi culo! Why you kicking me in mi culo?!?" and "AYUDA ME! POR FAVOR, somebody, ANYbody, AYUDA ME!!!!", followed by an extremely savage thud, followed by a muffled "Mi mandibula! Me rompiste mi mandibula pendejo!", which was followed by even MORE savage thuds, as though someone was slamming Esrila's head repeatedly into the concrete floor... And then the lights kicked back on again. The room is an absolute mess. Broken furniture, makeup kits, busted mirrors, and other detritus litter the place. And, sitting in the center of the room, as if placed there very deliberately, is Esrila's mask, dead center in a pool of blood.
Esrila's dressing room door flies open and an angry Analicia charges in.
Analicia - "Esrila, you are fucking fiiii.... WHAT in the unholy FUCK happened NOW?!?!
The camera switches back to the arena as it goes pitch black, and the tron lights up as the PA plays the sounds of children giggling creepily and once more "Monster (Under My Bed)" by Call Me Karizma plays. Words that gradate from white to red appear on the screen.
"She was the second
There will be another
You will know me
Fear the monster
Fear the dark"
The tron goes blank except for the strange rune-like symbol, also gradated from white to red, and the lights kick back on. A visibly shaken Clara and Julian appear on screen.
Julian Gill - "Did... Did you hear that shit? Did you SEE that shit?! Whoever this monster is, I think they just killed El Chalupa!"
Clara Winters - "Esrila."
Julian *nodding* - "That's what I said: Enchilada!"
Clara *sighing* - "Let's just go on to the next match..."
Drake Connors *Impersonating Bryan Anderson* - "Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall and is a tag team match! Introducing first, from Las Vegas, Nevada and Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, at a combined weight of 368 pounds, "The Fat Ass" Mike Dimter and "The Dumb Bell" Victoria SCOTT!"
Mike and Victoria step out onto the entrance stage, but whip a glare back at the sound guys (and a laughing Drake and Andi), who are playing "Friday" by Rebecca Black just to screw with them. Frowning, Mike and Vicky slouch down to the ring, entering with a petulance seldom seen from them. The music cuts out before everyone in the audience kills themselves from it's awfulness. Mike and Vicky have a quick discussion and it seems Dimter will be starting off for their team.
Bryan Anderson - "And their opponents, from and undisclosed location in Texas and Brooklyn, New York, "The Dark Angel" Drake Connors and "Sweeter Than Candy" Andi Lynx, also known as High Caliber 2: Electric BOOOOGALOOOOOO!"
The opening notes of "Heroes and Legends" by 3 One Oh rips out of the PA to massive pops as Andi Lynx steps out onto the entrance stage, a giant lolly in hand, dressed in blue and black. She twirls the lolly a bit, cocking it on her left shoulder.
**Can't help it that were chosen
Names up on a poster
Everybody knows that when we win it's cause we're s'posed to
Fighting with the dark side
Running but you can't hide
Talking all that shhhh
All that trash it's got you tongue tied
We came here to win it
Won't stop till we're finished
You better be ready to throw down
Calling us famous
Our names in the papers
And we find our way cause we know how
Don't get it twisted we doing our business
They're chanting our names and it's so loud
Better believe it we can't be defeated
No way**
Drake steps out onto the stage with Andi, dressed in a black and blue leather coat, matching trunks and kick pads, sporting a Willy Wonka type top hat of crushed blue velvet with a pink ribbon, and carrying a pimp cane done up to look like a red, white, blue, and pink candy cane, which he spins like a staff for a moment before planting it in front of him to HUGE pops from the fans. Blue and pink pyro fires off with multiple blasts from the entrance stage.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens
Heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
The two begin to walk down the ramp, Andi in a carefree sort of way, almost skipping, twirling her giant lolly around, smiling and obviously having the time of her life. Meanwhile, Drake is strolling casually down the ramp like a gentleman, tipping his top hat here and there to a lucky fan or two, holding the edge of his coat and planting his cane as he walks like he's some kind of old-timey rich guy, occasionally laughing and spinning his cane like a bo staff, which is clearly making Dimter and Scott a bit nervous.
**Can't stop us when we go in
Kings and queens are foldin
There's something in our touch
Feel the rush yeah we're golden
Sending out a message
Leave them in the wreckage
Unbreakable, powerful forces not to mess with
We came here to win it
Won't stop till we're finished
You better be ready to throw down
Calling us famous
Our names in the papers
And we find our way cause we know how
Don't get it twisted we doing our business
They're chanting our names and it's so loud
Better believe it we can't be defeated
No way**
Andi trades high fives with lucky fans as Drake mounts the ring apron, moonwalking back and forth to ensure clean boots before leaning against the ropes and finally looking out at the crowd, who are losing their minds cheering for the enigmatic superstar. With a cocky smirk, Drake casually backflips over the top rope, holding on with one elbow to spin around and lean cockily against the ropes facing the inside of the ring, thumping his cane into the mat. He then parts the top and middle ropes for Andi, who enters quickly and with cheerful enthusiasm, giving the fans a cheerful wave, she raises her lolly up high with pride before putting it on her shoulder.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
Andi and Drake mount the turnbuckles in their corners, a white spotlight hitting both of them from above as they both lean back with their arms open wide, soaking in the rabid pops from the fans as blue and pink pyro erupts from all four ringposts, their backwards leans the only things preventing them from being scorched. Tossing the cane, lolly, top hat, and coat to ring attendants, they both drop down to the mat.
**We are the heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens
Heroes
We're talking legends
Won't back down till
Our hands are to the heavens**
Andi and Drake suit the songs lyrics to action as they lift one fist each to the heavens, again to rabid pops from the fans. After a quick chat, in which Drake tells Andi that "you've got this", Andi will be starting off for HC2:EB against Mike Dimter. Mike again makes a "kissy face" at Andi, who again gags and then indicates Dimter has a small peepee by holding her fingers centimeters apart and shaking her head in the negative. Dimter is fuming as the ref calls for the bell. Dimter charges out of his corner looking to tie up with Andi, but she's not dumb enough to fall for that as she gracefully spins out of Dimter's way. Dimter crashes into Drake's corner, and Drake flicks Dimter on the ear. Dimter turns to glare at Drake for a moment, but should not have and he catches two hard side head kicks to both sides of his nugget from Andi. Dimter takes a wild swing at Andi, but again, Drake flicks Dimter on the ear, distracting him long enough for Andi to nail Dimter with a standing tornado DDT! The fans pop for the peppy little rookie. Dimter sits up in the corner, and Drake crouches down on the apron and flicks Dimter on the ear yet again, distracting the old coot long enough for Andi to hit a running delayed corner basement dropkick! Drake stands up, laughing his butt off as Andi makes the tag, and they deliver simultaneous side head kicks to both sides of Dimter's skull at once, spin and twirl around each other like graceful dancers, and nail him with ANOTHER simultaneous side head kick! The fans are roaring for the display of speed and grace from this new dynamic duo as Andi exits the ring, and Drake hits Dimter with the Devil's Due (inverted spinning crucifix bomb)! Drake drags the groggy Dimter up to his feet and tags Andi back in. Drake drags Dimter to center ring, then runs to the ropes to build up momentum, as Andi nails Dimter with a chop block Drake blasts him with a Divine Retribution (modified Joker driver)!
Clara Winters - "Oh my god, it's the same move they used on Dimter in the triple threat match!"
Julian Gill - "I believe they call that team move "Nightmare on Candy Lane", Clara!"
Clara Winters - "Well, whatever they call it, Jules, it's damn effective! Dimter is out cold!"
Drake exits the ring as Andi goes for the pin! 1! 2! NO! the pin is broken up by Victoria Scott, which causes Drake to enter the ring and blast Scott with a Demoncast (540 Kick), getting the older woman off of Andi's back. Scott rolls back to her corner as Drake exits the ring, the ref herding him out, and Dimter somehow finds the energy to shoot across the ring and make a fast tag to Scott. Scott comes charging into the ring like a house afire, and goes for Victoria's Secret (Gory Bomb) on Andi, but Andi somehow counters and turns it into a strange, flippy, spinny, crazy move that spikes Scott's face right into the mat with powerful authority. Drake is grinning like a fiend as Andi tags him in, and he immediately rushes across the ring and straight up fucking ninja kicks Dimter in the ear, knocking the old man off of the apron to the floor, where he's is knocked unconscious with his ass up in the air. Drake then charges back across the ring, drags Scott back up to her feet and then hits a Reverse Alabama Slam airplane spin as Andi flies in with an off the top rope Codebreaker!
Julian Gill - "By gawd, I think they just killed Victoria Scott!"
Clara *shuffling papers* - "They call THAT one the Cotton Candy Fever Dream, Jules, and I don't think I've EVER seen a more athletic and original team finisher!"
Drake, as the legal man, rolls Scott up and gets the 1!2!3!
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen, here are your winners by pinfall, "The Dark Angel" Drake Connors and "Sweeter Than Candy" Andi Lynx, HIGH CALIBER 2: ELECTRIC BOOOOOOGALOOOOOOO!!!!"
"Heroes and Legends" rips out of the PA as Andi and Drake point finger guns at Dimter and Scott, dropping the "hammers" at the same time as the crowd yells along with them for a "BANG! YOU'RE DEAD!!" Reclaiming their props from the attendants, Drake slips on his coat and pops on his fresh top hat, holding the ropes open for the giant lolly wielding Andi Lynx, who exits the ring, followed by Drake with his usual cocky backflip over the rope exit, then both members of the newly formed tag team strut confidently back up the ramp to the back as a groggy Victoria Scott pulls an even more groggy Mike Dimter up to his feet to limp on over to the backstage area.
Cameras cut back over to Bryan Anderson who is ready to get things rolling with the show's main event as the hot crowd is cheering in anticipation.
Bryan Anderson - "Ladies and gentlemen this next match is your Monday Night Mayhem MAIN EVENT!! Introducing first, now residing in Florida, coming to us by way of London, England, he is "THE SYSTEM" DANIIEEL SLAAIINNE!"
"99 Bottles" blasts from the arenas pa system and a smiling Daniel Slaine walks out from behind the curtain,he stands smiling out at the crowd and starts to bounce up and down on his toes before running the length of the ramp and sliding into the ring under the bottom rope, Slaine quickly climbs the ropes and throws his fists in the air roaring out at the fans who in turn roar back.
Bryan Anderson - "Now introducing his opponent, from Winnipeg, Canada, Austin REYNOOOOLDS!"
The fans go bananas as "Devil Trigger" by Case Edwards blasts out of the PA and Austin Reynolds steps out from behind the curtain. He poses for a moment before firing a finger gun at the camera and then charging down to the ring to baseball slide in under the bottom rope. While it looks as though he's getting ready to pose after getting up to his feet, instead he blindsides Slaine who was waiting just outside the ring with a baseball dropkick. Now joining him outside of the ring, Reynolds lays in some stiff strikes, also bouncing Daniel's head against the ring apron a few times before tossing him back into the ring.
Julian Gill - "Austin Reynolds not playing games tonight here Clara."
Clara Winters - "Yeah I'm definitely shocked he went after Slaine the way he did but with Gold Rush just around the corner you can't blame the guy."
Austin slides back into the ring, nailing Slaine with a few knees to the midsection but as he goes to pick him up Daniel spins out of it and drops him with a discus clothesline that nearly takes his head off. Obviously irritated from the tactics used earlier, Slaine wastes no time in following up after the heavy strike, picking up Austin and dropping him right back to the canvas with the KTFO (Knocked the fuck out-GTS) pinning him for the three count!
Bryan Anderson - "Here is your winner of the match, DAANIIEEL SLAAAIINNE!"
Slaine's celebration is cut short as the familiar sound of "Reckless" by Lacuna Coil starts to be heard. Invicta owner Analicia comes out, seeming not pissed off for the first time all night. Raising the mic up, she gives a quick cut throat signal which leads to her music immediately stopping as she begins her address.
Analicia - "Pretty fucking impressive, I must say. Now I'm going to make this as short as possible since I know if I don't, someone else on my roster's going to end up with their ass kicked or dead so here goes. This match was of great importance regarding our first pay-per-view Gold Rush. Now while the outcome doesn't exactly mean that one of you is out of the match, it most certainly means that the other is in. So congratulations, soak in the moment while you can."
Analicia, as she stated, made it short and sweet, quickly heading backstage as Daniel Slaine looks on pleased, the slow closing out with him celebrating some more as the crowd goes wild.